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I plan to visit my girlfriend in Iran. She's Persian (from Tabriz), I'm French and we’re not married.

We're planning to see each other for a week. We don't know yet where but Tehran would be nice given the amount of activities or in the north (like Rasht) for their openness.

She doesn't have a house for herself since she's still living with her parents until she joins me in Germany next winter. It would be inappropriate to act as lovers in their house, even hold hands.

Hotels don’t accept shared rooms for non-married couples (due to islamic law), and sometimes don’t accept single women at all. The fact she's single is written on her passport and all hotels ask for it. Also, she doesn't have any other nationality. We don't know where we can meet at all because of this.

Do you know a place where we can have privacy (to be precise, have physical contact of any kind, such as holding hands or hugging, not sex) there?

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    They don't look at the rings, they will check her passport where it is mentioned she is single
    – 42123456
    Dec 9, 2017 at 16:26
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    This is very dangerous since hotels keep passports there. If they find out, there's no way to get out of there without putting her in danger or me of the country.
    – 42123456
    Dec 9, 2017 at 16:40
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    Is travelling together to a less restrictive jurisdiction not an option?
    – user4551
    Dec 9, 2017 at 17:18
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    It is not. We met twice in Turkey but this time, it is not possible
    – 42123456
    Dec 9, 2017 at 17:19
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    @Kuba the fact that you are both non-Iranian def. matters :) - for cases where both are Iranian most probably you have to prove you are married! Can't guess what happens in a case such as his - however, I'm closer to it being still problematic.
    – hatef
    Dec 9, 2017 at 22:52

2 Answers 2

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Book from local hosts maybe? Although, haven't tried it myself while living there, I believe they have less restrictions.

Furthermore, going to the northern parts of Iran is definitely a good idea, if you intend to just see her (and not the country and its main tourist attractions) while in a more relaxed environment. Rasht (my hometown) is indeed famous for having the most open minded people in Iran; and you can somehow extend that to the other neighboring cities - Shiraz and Tehran are also doing well in ratings.

Back to my suggestion let me give you an example on how to hunt such places; if you drive from Rasht towards Anzali (or any other famous city in the Caspian Sea like: Ramsar, Kelardasht, Chalous, ..), you will often see people standing by the side of the street holding a board that says: Villas for rent - or you can find similar villas on the internet websites like these: 1, 2, 3; they are in Persian but I bet your girlfriend can help you with that - just bear in mind that you have to be more attentive renting a place in this way :)

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    +1 - in Rasht the tourist info center (hidden a little down an alley) was amazingly helpful and would help connect with other non-mainstream accommodation. Masuleh or other places in the nearby mountains might also be worth a look.
    – Mark Mayo
    Dec 10, 2017 at 0:43
  • I will ask my gf to take a look but it sounds great. Thank you so much
    – 42123456
    Dec 10, 2017 at 7:07
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    Thanks everyone for the answers. We're gonna rent a house in the north of Tehran as the north was not so convenient for us
    – 42123456
    Feb 8, 2018 at 10:31
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Iran has a really tough situation regarding the matter, though in recent years its strict laws are gradually fading away.

The most simple legal solution is for you to marry her (more of an arrangement between you two to avoid the problems).

It may seem pretty out of hand for you at first. But marriage has a simple and routine process and it barely would take longer than an hour for you to sign the documents and be done with it. In case of later finding out you don't want to continue your relationship she can simply sign some papers and get a divorce. The process is nothing close to what you have to go through in the western countries.

Pros:

  1. You wouldn't need to be afraid of anything and could openly go around with her.
  2. Experience a true relationship, a sneaky one would force both of you into subsidiary matters.
  3. You'll avoid anything harmful to happen to your relationship by being found out by the gov or her family.
  4. If you've seen her before twice and you're that serious to travel to Iran because of her, maybe it's time to meet her parents.

Cons:

  1. She has to probably tell the matter to her family. That depends on her parents and their relationship. But it's probably the case And it's not very easy for girls in Iran to do that. But in case she decides to hide the matter from them. It's totally OK and you can still marry together without any problem.
  2. she'll have to always point at the relationship she had with you through at her life because of your name on her ID docs.

You can later on have a real marriage when you both made up your mind about it.

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  • We have thought about it but we'd like to avoid it, even the temporary one. As you say, it's not easy for her to go this far, hidden or not because of the ID mention. But we're still undecided
    – 42123456
    Dec 18, 2017 at 13:00
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    I recommend you think more about it if you're both serious, that ID thing is not a big deal actually. Even if not written in her ID, She's got to be honest in her future relationships anyway, right? uhh and I'm from Tabriz too. I wish you both a great life
    – azerafati
    Dec 19, 2017 at 11:12
  • I guess it is not a big deal, but she want to join Europe by studying as an independent woman, not depending on a man.
    – 42123456
    Dec 19, 2017 at 12:58

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